Together

It's been eight months since I've been working yet, my girl wouldn't leave me to go to school on the days when she doesn't have to go to school.

Initially when it just started, I thought she needs time to settle down. But now I know, all that she wants is me.

It's my company that she longs for, the bike ride from home till our bus stops where we depart. She likes it.

She wishes to see me picking her from the bus when she is back from school, which I have not been able to do even once till now.

She missed me for her 'Show and Tell' program. She misses our 'reading together' times which seldom occurs these days.

I regret for having to go to school to teach other kids when I am not finding time to teach my own child.

Waiting for the next four months to pass by so that my girl wouldn't miss those beautiful moments which we share together.

I do not mind missing my job.

Understanding pain

The cry of the infants when they are in pain is completely different from how they would cry when they are hungry or bored.
By the time they turn 2 years, at least they can verbalise as to what pain they are undergoing.
They can even start understanding the pain of others, especially of their parents.
Of course, not the kind of pain that they inflict on us while they are playing pranks on us such as pulling hair or biting or pinching but the real pain which one undergoes when someone is not well.
Anvitha can clearly make out when either me or S is in pain and it hurts her as though she herself is in pain.
When I underwent surgery, she completely understood that her mom was not well and transformed her own self not to trouble others.
And when, I stopped lifting her because of the surgery...she silently obeyed by not asking me to carry her.
Recently, when I tried to carry her (first time after two months) the first words she said was 'Amma abbu' (abbu means pain).
Now, each time I try to lift her (which I seldom do) she repeats the same words.

Reunion

There are so many emotions and experiences which are best said in silence...
Looking at my daughter after 6 days was one such experience- Indescribable...
Both of us didn't know how to react...
I just cried while she found comfort hiding her face in her papa's arms.

No complaints and no grudges

Few days back Anvitha fell down from the cot (i still do not know if she actually fell down or came down by herself).
I felt miserable and guilty about as i knew it was my fault.
Yet there was no way and means for her to say 'amma you made me fall down'.

There are times when i am tired and frustrated at night when she refuses to sleep: i shout at her and a give beating too now and then.
Even then, the next day when she wakes up she gives me such a true smile and a hug!

She keeps no grudge against me and doesn't complain when i am at wrong but i shout for no fault of hers.